First, assumptions about what retirement is and looks like are outdated. They were formulated in the 50”s when people didn’t live long after retirement and looked forward in their few remaining years to taking advantage of all sorts of good new things–televisions, resorts, the national highway system and affordable cars. But now, 80 years later, you are more likely than not to live until you are 90. That means you have decades to live in retirement status. We didn’t want just to play for 30 years!
Second, a lot of today’s retirees are women. That’s new. And it seems that older women are viewed differently than older men. When you want a “gray hair” in the room, you mean you want an experienced, distinguished older man. Not a gray-haired woman with the same experience. Older men, maybe because they can still procreate, are silver foxes full of sex appeal. Older women, maybe because they can’t, are tired out and have lost their sex appeal. Of course, our observations are entirely different. The women we see are much more out and about, stylish and with it than the men! 
Third, having been part of the first wave of women who worked for decades and are now in a position to retire, we value that part of our identity that is based on the fact that we worked full time. We loved working and all the things that went with it. Interesting people, hard issues, great colleagues. We loved the confidence, financial security, sense of pride and accomplishment that came with our careers. People expected us to just go chill. We had no interest in that. We wanted to fill the big hole left when we stopped working.